The Coming Apocalypse

Have you noticed any signs of the coming apocalypse? Anything you are trying to keep secret? I am. I saw something last week that scared me shitless. I was up late powering down the lids. It was probably three thirty in the morning. I had just finished waxing a bowl of triple chronic. And slowly my hand started shaking. I dropped the lighter. The shaking started moving up my arm and into my brain. “I am in your head now.” It kept repeating “I am in your head now.” I took an empty mustard bottle and filled it with THC juice and slammed it into my ear hole. I squeezed the shit out of it and this small bald guy crawled out my other ear. My shoulder started shaking and I was chuckling uncontrollably. I leaned over and rested my forehead in my other hand. My whole body was shaking now. The small bald guy ran over and jumped into my VCR. I heard a ton of noise coming from it and he started throwing little gears and plastic sticks out of it. He emerged a second later with a chrome wheel on his back. He slid down the cabinet and cornholed a mouse.

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