Prepare to Herneate

2-4-6-8 Hookers. Prepare to herneate.
We were lined up in stalls. My nutsack only weighed 2wo pounds. I slipped a quarter in the machine and punched in the code for a triple. I closed my eyes and flipped the switch. When I opened them there were a half dozen triple-breasted pixies tenderizing my pud. Then she walked up. Somehow she knew my name and she whispered into my ear.
“Cave Man. I know something you don’t.”
“Join the club.”
“How would you like the most painful feeling ever?”
“How long would it take?”
“A couple minutes.”
I closed my eyes again and I was floating in pure ecstasy. And then all of a sudden my hips gave out and I fell to the ground.
I tried to get back up but I couldn’t bend my waist. I slid out under the door on my back and hit my head on the trash can. The judge jumped down from the counter top, hooked my balls on the scale and yelled out the increase.
“Ladies we have a winner. The new national champion of the fifth annual GUTS-IN-YOUR-NUTS sweepstakes …”
Gratz meef,
the rev

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